Monday, April 16, 2012

The Human Centipede: Am I that jaded?

Really, guys? Maybe it's me and I expected too much. But come on. Maybe I'm just the most jaded, you-can't-gross-me-out guy there is. My reaction after having watched "The Human Centipede: First Sequence" is ... wait for it ....


Seriously. I don't feel like I'm going to puke my guts out or that I'll have nightmares tonight (I'll let you know if I do). It was neither the best nor the worst movie I've ever seen.

Director Tom Six did a good job of not being anywhere near as gross as he could have been (or as gross as my imagination thought he could be). The make-up effects were well-executed and helped with the implied creation. Contrary to what you may have heard-- or even what you think you may have seen-- you don't see as much as you would think would be shown. So kudos to Six for that. It isn't easy these days to pull off something like this.

But at the end of the day, I'm left wanting. Like I said, maybe it's just me and there's something wrong with my brain. No, I don't actually WANT to see what the three people joined together look like under the well-placed bandages, but I feel like there should have been more to it. The villain, Dr. Heiter, was cold and efficient. The actor and two actresses portraying the victims were solid in roles that could not have been easy. Considering that the two actresses have to rely on muffled crying and their eyes to express themselves, they did an admirable job.

And that's part of the problem. It's a shining work of competence. There are certainly worse made films out there, some of which have become genre classics. And there are plenty good films that are better. The failing for me is that nothing in the movie felt exceptional.

Maybe the sequel, the "full sequence" as it's called, is more explicit. But you know what? I'm never going to know. Strange as it might sound, I have no time for mediocrity. Give me good or give me bad, (or so bad it's good, which should be a genre unto itself), but don't promise me the world and leave me bored and unsatisfied.

 An important caveat: The average viewer will probably be total grossed out by this movie. It's certainly not something I would recommend for the average viewer. On the other hand, I won't bother to recommend it for viewers who may have brain patterns similar to my own. I wouldn't want them to be bored, too.

THREAT LEVEL: BLUE. B is for blue. B is also for bored.

1 comment:

  1. The sequel is far more disgusting. It has virtually no dialogue from the main character, and it's in black and white for most of it. I dug it, far more than the first film. I can see not wanting to bother watching it though.